Do you ever think about how inefficient walking is? Today, when I was in a hurry, this was majorly playing on my mind.
**CONTENT WARNING** This post, these words, do not relate to Veganism, vegan people, or the vegan diet in any way, shape or form. Please do not base future encounters with vegans on the content you have read here- I’m a bit of an anomaly and not all vegans are like this **CONTENT WARNING**
Last night (well all day actually), was my friends birthday, and as parties go, I like to drink. I even took the liberty of researching all the alcohol on offer to make sure I was only drinking vegan! Needless to say, I ended up drinking quite a lot, probably became a little bit leary (there was a point when I was stood on a chair lecturing a 6ft5″ man about how he shouldn’t wear socks during sex…), and even managed to throw in a vegan conversation.
After all the fun and games (there weren’t any games actually-I WISH!), we headed our separate ways and I went to bed. I had already organised to arrive at the museum at midday rather than 10am, as I knew I’d need those precious extra 2 hours in bed.
Feeling very grown up and organised, I woke up at 9 and spent the next 2 hours (which I wish I’d spend in bed like a normal teen would) pottering around the house. I arranged the clutter in my room into a reasonably less cluttered looking pile on the floor, I fed the cats and I stroked the dog. BAM! 2 hours gone. Where did they go? Come back!
So here I am, 20 minutes until the bus arrives at the bus stop… And I’m stood in my pyjamas at home. So I rush chaotically around the house getting my things together for the museum and run out of the house. Get to the end of my road, feeling quite happy that I’ve managed to get out of the house so quickly, now 15 minutes to go, and realise I’ve forgotten my bus pass. This bus pass contains my life. It’s my way of getting to the museum, but also has my bank card in, so even if I could scrape together the change in the bottom of my bag to pay for the bus there, I have no card to get cash for the way back.
At this point I run back down my road, fumbling on my phone to call my brother “quick, bring my denim jacket to the front door I’ve forgotten my pass”.
It’s quite rare for me to run, and in my hungover state I didn’t last long.. But I got to the front door.
Then I started back down my road again, arms swinging and rucksack bouncing on my back. I was striding the fastest I could, 10 minutes til the bus goes and I have to wait 30 minutes for another one.
And that’s when I thought… Why is walking so inefficient. Birds fly so fast, even dogs run around like they’re on a mission. And I need to get to the bus stop and I just cant get there quick enough.
I nearly considered running, then I thought about just stopping and melodramatically giving up hope at ever catching this bus.
Humans are such inefficient movers. Except to be fair, we have created bikes, cars, planes and trains which move much faster than my half-arsed attempt at a power walk. But they weren’t on offer to me, so I stroppily strode on, pondering at why someone hadn’t evolved wheels for legs by now, or wings.
Come on evolution, catch up! Yes, it actually got to the point where I was blaming evolution for me being late!
After huffing and puffing, I got to the bus stop. Just as I was about to ask someone whether they’d seen the X41 bus leave yet, the bus arrived at the stop. What perfect timing. Maybe humans are efficient after all, I mean I got there didn’t I? Smugly I waited in line to get on, and am now sat on the bus very happy with myself for being so damn efficient.